Month: October 2018

Day 92

I have never claimed to be political nor have I ever really paid attention to any of that, but I’m not even in the US and I can’t not hear about everything going on. As soon as I tell people I’m from the US, the first thing they ask is, “So what do you think about trump?” They all ask wanting to know who voted for this son of a bitch, because they can’t fathom how a whole country could be this insane and/or stupid. Well, a lot of Americans wonder the same thing. Today, especially, it is hard to find anything positive and the few things that are, made me question the motives behind the news story.

 

Definition of Terrorist: a person who uses unlawful violence and intimidation, especially against civilians, in the pursuit of political aims.

Trump-supporting and/or hatred, racist supporting Neo-nazi’s, bombers, shooters, murderers, and especially those that support such actions through vicious posts, public signs, and demonstrations are terrorists in my book. You don’t have to send bombs out to be a terrorist, creating unjust laws do about the same amount of damage, ruining the lives of people and for generations to come through further institutionalizing hatred and segregation. Justifying hate crimes and giving these American terrorists a slap on the wrist compared to the terrorists we’ve “captured” from other countries.

Bombs kill, but so do the blind words of an idiot with authority. The 1st amendment allows you to speak your mind, but as soon as it impedes on someone’s safety, it is a threat. No threat is legal in this country and just because you hold an American birth certificate doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be punished to the extent of the law. If anything, I believe American terrorists should be punished even more so for abusing the rights that so many have struggled to gain. And just because you are a president does not make you above the law. In this country, it is also punishable to incite violence, so why hasn’t Trump been held accountable for inciting all these idiot, hate-loving fuckers to come out of the woodwork???

But that’s just my opinion*…

*Opinion should not be mistaken for fact

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Day 91

Woke up today early enough to make my 6am meditation. It really works wonders. I feel tall, accomplished, and so relaxed in my heart, soul, body and mind. Any later than 7am and Bali is a humid oven so it’s important that I get up as early as I can.

Traveled with my new friend Krisna to Seminyak beaches. A little hop down the coastline from Kuta and the beach is smooth, clean, and empty of people.

 

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Day 90

I went back to Kuta Beach this morning, there’s always something new going on. Today was a beach clean up event for the schools nearby. At the event, they released baby turtles into the ocean.

Had to go back to the Jimbaran fish market with my friend Krisna from Bandung, West Java. I love that place! Had fresh, grilled squid, oysters and clams with rice and tumis kangkung (AKA water spinach, a vegetable that tastes like spinach and broccoli stem, often sauteed with oyster sauce and chili). I could eat at this market everyday. Very cheap for what you get. 50k IDR ($4 USD) for a half kilo of squid, 12K ($1 USD) for a kilo of clams, 10k (.60C USD) for green coconuts. You can easily spend over a 100K IDR ($7 USD) on one person in a restaurant. 100K at this market can comfortably feed 2 people. Did I mention it’s fresh and cheap?!

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Day 89

Visited The seafood market near Kuta. Great array of seafood. King prawns bigger than I have ever seen them. Parrot fish, snapper, squid, octopus, etc. After you choose what you want, you can walk to a kitchen stall nearby and have them cook it for you. All very cheap and very fresh. Important: choose fish with clear, healthy colored eyes. The clearer, the fresher!! Discolored items aren’t fresh. Trust your gut, if it doesn’t look/smell right, don’t eat it!

 

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Day 87

Alright finally caught up!! I don’t always have wifi and I definitely don’t have signal with my cheap phone, but it all works out.

This is my 2nd day in Kuta, Bali. Woke up at 6 and sat on top of the roof to meditate. Gamelan group was up early playing and it was so relaxing to listen to. I mediated for almost 40 minutes. My goal is to reach an hour. It’s not so easy calming your thoughts, relaxing enough that your own breath doesn’t distract you. I’m working on it, but I feel so good and accomplished. It’s a good way to start the morning.

After my meditation, I got some breakfast with my new friend Emily, that I met at the hostel I’m staying at. We walked down to Kuta Beach and watched the surfers. There are some really talented people…and a lot of beginners, but it was great to see everyone out there.

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Day 86

Yesterday

i was caught between wanting my freedom and doubting what i have. Caught like the sun; One half peeking over Mount Agung, the other kissing the pacific ocean goodbye. i didn’t know what i was saying goodbye to. A limbo as real and as deep as…well, my imagination, because i think that’s the only place this relationship exists.

 

Today

I’m saying goodbye to you. I realize I have my faults; but I also have my relentless determination. 9 days sober, learning to slow down my thoughts and practices, taking in the signs from Mother Earth herself. I am no one’s, but my own. I will not lose myself to the semblance of you again nor will I ever want to resemble that lost, hurting pup I was. Growing into my paws has been an awkward, painful, and most definitely confusing process–not that it’s over, far be it! But…I know what basic things I need and Mother Earth knows that I’m not afraid to cut dead weight.

 

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Day 85

Part 1

All the tourists push this way, that way. Yelling at people to get out of their pictures, yet none of them stop long enough to enjoy what they’re oohing  and aaahhing  at. If only to say, I’ve been here. Ask them what the air smelled like, how smooth the rocks were underneath the waterfall, what shade of green were the taro’s leaves. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. But, I was there. I was there. I was there.

 

Sometimes the best way to enjoy everything, is to do nothing.

 

Part 2

10am.

Water trickles down a handmade fall, calming and racing at the same time, keeping a beat faster than my sore feet could follow;

The endless sputtering of motorbikes on the road, men, women, children often packed on a bike together, get to work, school, and begin the days errands;

Tourists gabbing along, “Where’s this?” “How much?” “Look at that!”;

Taxi men desperately, shouting for business, “Where do you want to go?” “Cheap, very cheap!”;

A random, unseen group burst of laughter from a corner room apartment, a good joke, it sounds like;

Clanging and sawing echoing from the building under construction across the way, they’ve been working on it for months, one man at a time, sometimes two;

A baby crying for it’s breakfast tit, mother walking up and down in front of her house, humming;

A pigeon cooing in it’s cubby hole in the wall, a guttural huucuuu cuuuu, huucuuu cuuuu;

A milky white butterfly whispering around the dying staghorn, a gentle breeze to carry it’s powdery wings;

A fly buzzing around my morning coffee, looking for any spot to land it’s dirty butt on;

The sun teasing my toes, peek-a-booing behind smog-laden clouds, making the rest of my body’s hair rise in humid anticipation,

A tea kettle’s sharp whistle, signaling a new pot of coffee, Please, no more! Terima Kasih;

A caged love bird’s call, intermittent between the propelling of its body into the bars, it’s endless search for an escape, but little does it know that I have found my escape in these sounds of Ubud.

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Day 83…Later that Day

On today’s walk, I visited the Goa Gajah, AKA the Elephant Cave. This temple area is sacred and people wearing shorts are given a shall to cover up. Not much to see in the cave, I found it hot and claustrophobic. However, the handiwork of the cave mouth is very intriguing. Take a minute to admire it! Small details are easy to miss. Also, the parade floats are a trip. They are made from food. As you can see most of them are made from beans, grain and rice stalks. One of them, however, is made from pig parts. Everything is used, the skin, the feet, intestines, fat–EVERYTHING! Impressive and gross at the same time.

Down below there is a stream, waterfall, and pond to admire. The pond in particular I found very serene, I sat there for a while just people watching.

Later on I sat down for a coconut and a stray dog found me and just made himself comfortable next to me. I needed that so much. So Before I mentioned that I had my wallet and backpack stolen while in Honolulu. Well, my card had to be replaced and it was such a stressful nightmare to get it, because they couldn’t find the address to the hotel I was staying at. I was using all my cash to book hotels and pay for everything. Yeah, it kind of hurt my pocket…The quiet time at the pond and this dog were my signs, my test of patience and emotional control. The universe was really pushing me to relax and have faith in the world. To be reasonable with my energy and time. If I can’t do anything to fix the problem, then there’s no use worrying. If you’ve done everything you can, then that’s all you can do–Don’t worry about it. Worry is interest paid. It just eats you alive.

 

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Day 83

Bali is known for being one of the most artistic of all the Indonesian islands and it shows. Walking down the street you see all kinds of talent on display, from architects, sculptors, painters, carpenters, graffiti artists, and more. Don’t be afraid to stop and ask them how they’re doing and what they’re up to. Balinese people are very kind and open to meeting new people. Don’t be afraid to ask questions; I feel it’s respectful to learn than regret never having made the effort.

 

 

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